Death vs. Dying

I am not afraid of death, I am afraid of dying.


There's a difference.


Let me tell you.


Death is the end. I don't fear the end. In fact, I anticipate it. I want total resolution. I want answers. I want the conclusion. I don't fear death, because I seek it. I seek death because I seek answers. It's my ultimate goal. The end. The very end. Why do you live? Because you will die. It's the benchmark.


People laugh because they might cry the next day.
People cry because they want to smile the next day.
People let go because they want to move on.
People move on because they had to let go.
People live to die.
People die because they live.


To die is to have lived.
To live is to die.
We all die.
We will die.


I don't fear death.
Because death will welcome me.


But I fear dying. Dying is the process. Dying is the agony. Dying is the pain. Dying is what I fear. Death is a stop button, but dying is a consolidate button functions. Dying is paused. When we are dying, everything stops temporarily.


We get to see what we don't get to see.
We get to understand what we don't understand.
We get to pause.
We get to wait.
We get to wait for death.
And waiting is agony.


Dying is play, because it likes to play games. Once paused, once played. It's temporary. When you pause, you play.


When you live, you die.
When you die, you have lived.


Dying is rewind. Suddenly, you're smarter than you think. You remember the details. Every single detail. The color. The day. The time. The place. The who you're with. The feelings. The reason. The result. The regret.


You get to see everything in rewind.
Because dying does not only pause, it rewinds.
And that's in order.
You pause.
You rewind.
You play.
You fast forward.
To death.
And you stop.
To death.


Dying is a long process. I fear the process. I fear dying.
Because dying is different than death.




I am not afraid of death, I am afraid of dying.