Michael Jackson is a burden I will happily bear

Michael Jackson is a burden I will happily bear.

There come moments. It could be a random mention of the name 'Michael' on the street or if you're lucky, you get the surname 'Jackson' too. It could be your neighbor playing some Michael tunes out of the blue. It could be Halloween blasting the bestseller song 'Thriller'. It could be that one recommended video on your Youtube account you decided to play only because it contains the word 'Rare' and there you are hoping it's a clip you haven't seen before.

And then one video comes another.

And all of the above only leads to one: It loops you in.

Like right now.

I am once again mourning, crying, regretting.

Michael Jackson can make me laugh, proud, happy, sad, cry, insecure, determined, and every other word that may fit the bank. Re-watch one or two interviews and there I am again, on a time warp to July 14, 2007 or worse, to June 25, 2009.

I am once again feeling so down.

Like an anchor pulling me down to the bottom of the ocean.

And I can't move.

I can't breathe.

I can't figure out why Michael Jackson have this effect on me.

I feel his pain. Or the pain he felt.

I feel his loneliness. Or the loneliness he felt.

I can feel it all.

Such a burden... I am willing to bear.

Because Michael Jackson is a part of me and no matter how it consumes me, I will forever bear the consequences it gives me.

Because the anchor keeps the ship in place.

And Michael Jackson keeps me sane.